Listen to a companion tapping: (Download MP3)
Have you ever asked, or been asked, are you there?
It is a very good question, and an even better invitation.
When you are on a call, in a meeting, listening to a loved one about their day, meditating, working out… are you really… truly… “there”?
This is about showing up, paying attention, and being present.
So when you engage in your life – the details, the chores, the joys, the work, the guilty pleasures, ask yourself honestly…
Are you there? Are you all there?
How are you showing up for yourself?
Why aren’t you showing up for yourself?
What blocks you from showing up?
There are so many excuses, learned behaviors, and habits that keep you from being fully present to yourself, your emotions, and your life. Here are a few reasons you might not truly show up:
- It would feel too real
- It feels selfish, you’d feel guilty
- It’s easier not to
- They are too needy
- There isn’t enough time
- You were never taught how
- You’d have to face the truth
- There are too many distractions
- You won’t have any more excuses
It’s important to figure out why you may not be showing up, fully present; then you can make a clear decision about whether you want to change this pattern.
I want to be fully present. That doesn’t mean I am, but I try, regularly, and recommit as often as I need to because it feels better to be “there” for the good stuff and the difficult stuff as well. I know the temptation has always been to flee, pretend, deny, numb… but once you realize you can handle the difficult stuff, you no longer need those props and can just truly show up.
I know this suggestion is scaring some of you, but it’s a huge relief to “be there” for yourself and your life. Willing to give it a try?
Below are some sample Tapping sequences. As usual, change the wording to suit your needs and feelings. (That would be a great step towards showing up for yourself!)
On the 0-10 point scale, how hesitant/ reluctant/ resistant are you to really show up for yourself?
Side of hand: Even though I was never taught to show up for myself because I had to take care of them, I deeply and completely love and accept myself anyway… Even though I feel guilty when I show up for myself, it seems selfish, I accept my feelings anyway… Even though I’m afraid to show up because then I’ll have to face some difficult truths, I accept all of me and my feelings.
Eyebrow: I’m afraid to show up for myself
Side of eye: I don’t even know how
Under eye: Wouldn’t it seem selfish?
Under nose: I feel guilty when I’m present for myself
Chin: I’m afraid to show up fully
Collarbone: I don’t want to feel the conflicts
Under arm: I don’t want to face what I want to avoid
Top of head: It’s easier to be distracted
Take a deep breath and continue Tapping:
Eyebrow: I’m afraid to be present
Side of eye: I don’t even know how
Under eye: What if it’s painful?
Under nose: I don’t know how to be present
Chin: I’m afraid to be really present
Collarbone: I don’t want to feel difficult stuff
Under arm: I don’t want to face what I’ve been trying to avoid
Top of head: It’s easier to be distracted
Take a deep breath… and measure your fear of showing up again, fully present for yourself… and then try these supportive statements:
Eyebrow: I’ve been afraid all this time
Side of eye: I’ve been distracted but I’m willing to change
Under eye: I want to show up
Under nose: I choose to be present
Chin: I’m ready to start showing up
Collarbone: I appreciate how I got here
Under arm: I appreciate where I’m going
Top of head: I choose to show up for myself now
Keep Tapping on any blocks to showing up emotionally for yourself, and then make a decision about how present you want to be.
Enjoy,
Carol
